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The world according to Piers

Now we love a ridiculous celebrity list as much as the next man but Piers Morgan's oxymoronic chart as to 'who matters in the world of UK celebrity' is pushing the bar. The only thing this makes us think is that Piers has cooked his own hype, feasted it on it and had it for desert.

The list, in the Daily Mail, counts down from 100 - 1 in 20 person instalments. Celebs are only allowed onto the revered list if they are talented, or famous on the back of having no talent at all. While this might strike many as a standard benchmark of modern fame, Piers thinks he came up with the concept first.

So, who made the top? If, like us you made the mistake of reading the list backwards, Heather Mills was top, i.e at 100, swiftly followed by Vinnie Jones, Delia Smith, JK Rowling, David Attenborough and Sienna Miller, Holly Willoughby, Adrian Chiles, Anne Robinson and zzzzzzzz....many more.

Piers, do the above motley crue really 'excite' you? (criteria for inclusion in the list was just that.) We think this was an exercise in finding 100 UK celebs, not ones who matter. In fact Piers must have used up every available column fodder he could think of. Back to the drawing board Mr Morgan - celebrity lists should at least raise an ironic titter, this only raises a groan.

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