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Sod the malaria, pass me a martini

Chezza is alive and well, but has apparently morphed into Kate Moss or Keith Richards. Maybe a brush with death does that to a celeb. Cheryl Cole attended a dinner party with Piers Morgan, and got stuck into the martinis and fags, like a girl given a new lease of life.

According to Morgan's description in The Daily Mail, 'She looked fabulous, considering what she's been through. Wearing a shimmering dark blue dress, very high heels, and longer than usual flowing auburn hair. 'Like a drink?' I asked. 'I'm not supposed to...' 'Nobody's supposed to. Treat yourself...' 'Well I suppose a small apple martini isn't going to kill me.' 'No, the malaria might but a martini definitely won't.'

And Piers continued the report in bizarre Mills and Boon style, 'A waiter brought round a plate of delicious caviar canapés. 'I've always wanted to do this,' I said, grabbing one and moving it directly towards the most desired mouth in Britain. 'What the hell are you doing?' she exclaimed. 'I'm feeding you caviar,' I said. 'Every man's dream.' 'No, you're not,' she insisted, shoving my arm away. 'I hate the stuff! I'll have a fag instead.'

What a girl...

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