Ridiculously pretty pair wed

Good looking elf and pirate Orlando Bloom has made an honest model of his fiancee Miranda Kerr. The two ran off to marry in secret, and no facts are known about the ceremony or the honeymoon. Ooh, mysterious...and annoying.

According to The Daily Mail, Miranda cancelled a work gig with a man called Mr Jones, in order to get hitched. She then released a statement, where she was probably contractually obliged to mention said Jones multiple times, 'David Jones very graciously released me during this period so we could celebrate an intimate ceremony and honeymoon together. I am enormously grateful to David Jones to have been given this time to enjoy such a special moment in my life.'

Miranda has previously spoken of her wish to have children, and live the classic celeb dream of smug eco-chic, 'I've always wanted kids, so someday, eventually, yes, it will happen. My ideal situation would be to live on a farm in a solar-powered house with a hammock and a vegetable patch. When this is all over, that's where I'll be.'

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