So we are down to the final three in X Factor and well, none of them seem to be particularly spectacular, apart from Rhydian (you know, candy-floss hair and lots of operatics). But can we really see people buying a nu-opera album? Many people have touted this year’s batch of pop wannabes as the weakest since the show started, but there is always one person who does well - Mr Simon Cowell.

The TV villain, whom we all love to hate, will earn a total of £35million over three years for his part on the X Factor and its US counterpart American Idol. And, if this wasn’t enough already, he also gets to sign whomever he wants from the show. And judging by Leona Lewis’s success (seven weeks at number 1, is it?) he’s raking it in and is reportedly worth £100million. Not bad, eh?

So who cares if the contestants are rubbish? All we want are trousers pulled up, quick putdowns and a sly, radioactively white smile…

(Image: from YouTube)