Time for naughty old Wacko to start hunting down the back of the sofa for spare shrapnel. His Neverland ranch is being put up for sale as of next month (unless he pays a niggling 24 million dollar tax bill) - because he simply can't keep up with the mortgage repayments. The hammer's due to fall on the Californian Neverland estate as of March 19th and could fetch as much as 30million dollars. Once it's collection of very odd and ludicrously expensive tat is sold off that is.

So thinking of putting in an offer? Lets see what you'd get for your money. There's the Neverland zoo. The merry go round. The fun fair - complete with bumper cars and ferris wheel. The 'sea dragon' (whatever that is). The super dooper wave swinger...(whatever that is) The mega slide (ookay..). And the dragon wagon kiddie roller coaster. (...big Hmmmm) And thats only the outside. Gawd only knows what he's been hoarding on the inside.

Whether the King Of Pop will actually turn up to see his Peter Pan utopia sold off like a common housing estate is anyone's guess. Since his 2005 child abuse trial he's been holed up in another oasis of fantastical excess - Bahrain. No doubt frittering the remainder of his fortune on giant, useless bars of gold. Could the dole queue be beckoning....?