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Kate Middleton: working class

The royal wedding is creeping up on us slowly, tippy-toeing its way into our souls, reminding us that for us long as we live we will always be serfs, serfs who have to doff the cap and stump up silly money for when a member of the aristocracy fancies getting married. What a world.

Anyway, while the dizzying media frenzy continues, various Brits are embarrassing us all across the globe by dribbling on baout how much they’d like to be there to see Willsy and Kate get hitched: the latest is the improbably sexy Helen Mirren, who at 66 years of age really shouldn’t be quite so attractive: it’s disturbing.

Anyway, not only did she pitch up on Late Night With Jimmy Fallon in the States and claim that Kate Middleton was ‘working class’, she also claimed that she wants to sneak her way in to the ceremony. We can only assume she was joking – we hope.

‘I've got a good feeling about Kate because she's a working class girl,' she said. 'I'm not even quite sure when it is. Is it soon? Is it next week?

‘I wasn't invited. I tried bribing people, I even tried finding a way in over the back of the Abbey. I've even tried to get myself an Archbishop of Canterbury outfit because I thought I might kidnap him and do the actual ceremony, because I do a lot of these gender-bending roles.’

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