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Judge slams Mills evidence

Heather Mills is a money grabber who tells porky pies. So says kindly Judge Bennett.

The Macca- Mucca verdict, released this afternoon, slams Mills's evidence as 'inconsistent and innaccurate', referring to Mills as overall, 'less than candid, and a less than impressive witness'. Which is a nice fuddy duddy judgey way of saying a bit crackers. And a fibber.

The sensible judge also poo poohed Mucca's claims of being a rich and successful lady before marrying Macca, as well as her suggestions of having donated 80-90% of her earnings to charity pre Paul. Apparently her bank statements just didn't add up.

"Her tax returns for 1999 and 2000 do not support the wife’s case of very significant earnings.....furthermore, her assertion that she gave away to charity 80 per cent to 90 per cent of her earned income is inconsistent..."

"The wife, for her part, must have felt rather swept off her feet by a man as famous as the husband. I think this may well have warped her perception, leading her to indulge in make-believe" charged Bennett gently, before finally getting into the swing of things and saying what he really meant. "To some extent she is her own worst enemy. She has an explosive and volatile character".

Macca on the other hand "expressed himself moderately, though at times with justifiable irritation, if not anger. He was consistent, accurate and honest". And while it wasn't lost on the Judge that Mills is a tasty enough lady, he ruled, "I have no doubt the husband found the wife very attractive. But equally I have no doubt that he was still very emotionally tied to Linda at the time of their meeting". I.e, on the rebound and netted in a honey-booby trap.....

Neither Mucca or Macca showed up to court today to hear the judges latest ruling. Mucca stayed home - fearing little Beatrice's safety. Whaaat? Sure that's not your own safety Mucca? With 24.3mill sitting in the bank you wouldn't want to get sprung by a gold digger........

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