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Jamiroq-why?

Jamiroqui's JK stopped being famous in the mid 2000s, and has been languishing in rich obscurity ever since, with only his collection of fancy cars to keep him happy. So why, in his first attempt to make the public like him again, did he stumble around apparently drunk on the XFactor stage, and try to start a feud with Dannii and Cheryl? Mysterious...

A source told The Mirror that earlier in the week, JKay had attempted to whip up a storm in a teacup by saying of the twosome, 'You’re useless. The pair of you. I mean you look great and I’d like to f*cking shag you but that’s all.'

Having performed his (fairly boring) ditty on XFactor, JK announced to the audience, 'I have to say, I had reservations about coming on the show, but everyone has been charming and I've had a lovely time.' Dannii and Cheryl, however, refused to applaud, sitting looking stony faced.

JK, we think you've just reminded us why we fell out of interest with you the first time round...

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