It's no fix, honest guv!

Simon Cowell has taken the unprecedented step of writing an open letter to Mirror readers, to reassure the angry public that this year's X Factor is not a fix. On the contrary, it's apparently the least contrived telly show in history, and Simon claims he regularly meets with viewers in order to canvas their opinion. Hmm, excuse us while we put our cynical hat on, and stroke our beards in a sceptical manner...

Simon 'wrote' personally to the tabloid to put to bed all those pesky fix rumours. The hairy-handed TV god said, 'I think it’s appropriate because of some of the stories this week that I personally explained why we made certain decisions on The X Factor this year...throughout the series I have met with fans of the show on a regular basis and have listened and acted on their feedback. I believe they have enjoyed the changes in the show this year and I feel it’s been a better series as it hasn’t followed the same pattern as before.

He continued, 'We decided for the first time some weeks ago to put four people into the final and this meant having five semi-finalists. We also felt it would be fairer that there would be a sing-off rather than automatic elimination as there were more contestants. I understand new decisions are seen as controversial by our viewers but it stops the show becoming boring. As the excitement heats up, debates begin but I do want to assure people that the show is definitely not fixed...The sing-off on Sunday was something that was always going to happen regardless of who was in the bottom two. The contestants all prepared their save-me songs on Monday last week. It was always going to be sad for whoever left.

And on he droned, 'I genuinely believe this weekend’s final is the most open and could be the most exciting yet. All four contestants are incredibly talented. Our job is to ensure the viewers can watch a star-studded final, we will always be fair and respect our viewers. It’s your show. PS: Vote One Direction!'

We feel like we've just been clattered over the head with the full force of the Cowell PR machine. We're off for a lie down...

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