'I'm not father of a secret love child'

Okay celebrities - listen up! If there's a ridiculous rumour circumnavigating the web like a rickety old ship, one thing you must not (we repeat NOT) do, is to dignify it with a response. If you do, tawdry online magazines, (excite excepted, obviously), will repeat the rumour until it becomes a fact. Understand? Tom Felton, aka Draco Malfoy is, according to an anonymous online poster, the father of her child.

The (probably insane) anonymous mother sent in a postcard which stated, improbably, 'One of these men is the father of the most amazing little girl in the world. He's never met her, he never will. He probably can't even remember my name.' The postcard included pictures of various thespy celebs including Felton, Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint, Jason Isaacs, twins James and Oliver Phelps and Alan Rickman. So, most of the cash of Harry Potter, then.

Malfoy (sorry, Fenton) took to Twitter to deny the rumours saying 'my friend just found this on the web! just to confirm that i can be cancelled out of this equation lol!' Lolz indeed...

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