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Hot shot

Charlie Sheen’s been a little bit quieter than usual over the last couple of weeks: the man’s either refraining from making outrageous statements, or people have stopped jamming a microphone under his nose everywhere he goes.

However the Hollywood wild child, who not so long ago seemed to go completely mad, in public, has still got a few rounds left in his Torpedo Of Truth. While on stage last night, he recounted how his former fiancée Kelly Preston nearly killed herself while on the toilet at his house: the actress was having a tinkle when Sheen was dragged from his early morning drowsiness by a gunshot. Let’s have him take it from here.

‘I was downstairs one morning making coffee, and I thought she was upstairs, still asleep, and I heard a gunshot go off,' he said, to a shocked audience in Canada. 'And I thought, ‘She did it, she finally f****** did it. She killed herself, and they're gonna blame me’.

‘So I abandoned the coffee, because a gunshot in the morning will wake you up better than a cup of coffee. And I come around the corner and there's a naked Kelly Preston at the top of the stairs, holding her wrist, staring at me, covered in blood. And I thought, 'That's pretty f****** hot.' I didn't, I didn't.

‘So I ran to her and said, 'What happened?' And she said, 'I don't know. The gun went off, the gun went off.' And I thought that was some excuse.

‘After I grabbed some towels and some bandages and stopped the bleeding from cuts on her legs and on her wrist, she explained that when she lifted my pants off the scales in the bathroom while she was on the toilet... the tiny revolver I used to carry fell out of the back jeans pocket and hit the floor and shot a bullet right between her legs.

‘She got hit by shrapnel, from the toilet bowl... I didn't know whether to ring 911 (police) or 411 (directory services). But for years people always talked about the time I tried to kill Kelly Preston.’

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