Glasto-ny silences all round

The slebs were out in full force at Glastonbury this weekend, wearing their Hunter wellies and boho waistcoasts as if their lives and livelihoods depended on it (which it kind of does). However, they were not a well-behaved bunch, fighting and sulking like a bunch of 9 year-olds on a school trip.

First up, Sienna and Kate continued their five-year long emnity, a 'friend' told The Mirror, 'They refused to talk to one another, despite having practically the same group of friends who were all there. It was really strained - you could cut the atmosphere with a knife. Kate seemed to be doing her best not to glance at Sienna and tried to act all cool. Both looked embarrassed that they had bumped into each other at all.'

And uber couple (they even have the same name) Alexa Chung and Alex Turner had a fight behind the bogs. A spy behind the loos said, 'I heard all this shouting, full-on rowing, and walked out of the toilets to see Alex and Alexa. I was really surprised because they are usually so loved-up. They always seem like the perfect couple...They were pointing and waving their arms at each other, really not looking happy at all. And they didn't seem to care who was around to see it.'

We'll be generous to the stars, and blame it all on the heat wave. That, and the recession. Oh sod it, let's all have a fight...

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