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Dita Von Teese forgets to tease at Eurovision

In case you had something better to do on Saturday night (likely) and missed this year's Eurovision (impossible) Dita Von Teese was batting for the Germans, and pundits had high hopes that she might swing things in their favour.

Well as it turns out, Ze Germans didn't use Dita to their advantage nearly enough. In fact the Queen of Burlesque's performance (30 seconds at the end) was more damp squib than cabaret erotica, and the silver trousered Ricky Martin wannabee with cheesy dance moves to match, was forced to struggle on alone. Dita was said to have been 'shocked' by Germany's miserable 20th ranking.

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