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Charlie's no angel

So we feel a bit sorry for poor Lindsay Lohan. While the Mean Girl has been languishing behind bars, another Hollywood heavyweight has got off scot free for all manner of nasties. Charlie Sheen escaped prison yesterday after being convicted of assault. Instead of porridge, he'll be feasting on mungbeans and expensive green tea having been ordered to spend 30 days in a rehab centre. (We're imagining an oasis of celebrity calm deep in the Hollywood hills.) The charges relate to an incident in which Charlie allegedly held his wife, Brooke Mueller, at knifepoint. He then threatened to kill her if she divorced him. What a charming man....

The volatile pair have since reconciled and have both completed stints in alcohol rehab. None of which changes the fact that he threatened to kill his wife. Undoubtedly, Lindsay Lohan was a naughty girl when she skipped alcohol classes to large it in Cannes. But we can't help thinking that the strong arm of the law has come down on the wrong celeb this time.

If only Charlie had been faced with Lindsay's no nonsense sentencing judge. He may have been slapped with a well deserved stint in the slammer...

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