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Brand new controversy

Oops. Russell Brand has enraged the meedjah again. This time the Love Muscle offers a novel way of decontaminating chart music of identikit teenyboppers: getting them hooked on heroin and killing them off.

Russell gave his Darwinian tuppence worth to US Rolling Stone, claiming that 'natural selection' would sort the wheat from the chaff: ‘I don't think Justin Bieber could handle Syd Barrett's habit. You're just not allowed into the studio until you first have had drug-addiction issues. It separates the men from the boys. A lot of people in their journey to rehab - overdose. And then, perhaps, we would be spared their awful music. It's Darwinian. It's the law of natural selection.'

He summed up with more classic Brand jesting: ‘All children should be made to listen to music by people who wrote it on acid while staring wistfully at water.' Unsurprisingly, his controversial theories have gone down like a muck sandwich.

While we have to agree that the charts could do with a spring clean, killing them off sounds a touch harsh. Plus, has he forgotten that he's engaged to the cherry chapstick of corny American pop? Naughty Russell. We feel a grovelly apology coming on...

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