Barrel being scraped

As the years pass, Alan Partridge’s scene with the BBC chief commissioner for light entertainment becomes more and more prescient. The need for cheap filler for the myriad channels now available grows, and we (and by that we mean imagination-less TV execs) search further and further down the list.

Compared to the latest idea involving various celebs humiliating themselves for a brief snatch of exposure on the box, Swallow, the detective series set in Norwich (see below), seems like a stone cold stunner of an idea. Scream If You Know The Answer involves people as genuinely famous as Jordan trying to perform mundane tasks while on a Rollercoaster at Thorpe Park, and is hosted by boyband has-been Duncan James, once of Blue.

‘We can watch the celebrities and contestants being pushed and pulled here, there and everywhere by huge G-forces,’ said Lisa Perrin from UKTV, whose channel Watch will be showing this monstrosity. ‘With full access to legendary rides this is going to be Britain's most extreme game show ever.’ Can anyone say Inner City Sumo?

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